


Because no matter what

by MIA777



Category: The Grand Tour (TV) RPF, Top Gear (UK) RPF
Genre: Love/Hate, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-22
Updated: 2017-08-22
Packaged: 2018-12-18 18:43:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11880516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MIA777/pseuds/MIA777
Summary: Do we have the right to change those we love?And is there any sense in this, because we fall in love with them, with all their shortcomings.But in spite of everything you just need to love.





	Because no matter what

**Author's Note:**

> Again, I'm very sorry for the huge number of different mistakes, one day it will get better, I promise.  
> Thank you for reading this, I really appreciate it.  
> With love, Mia.

'Oh, do fuck off please' James was already on the stairs and was about to close the door behind himself in the bedroom.  
'James, listen, it's nothing!' Jeremy desperately tried to catch him by his hand, but James just ignored all his attempts. Jeremy had an opportunity to catch his lover by his hand only when James reached the bedroom door and scrolled the door handle roughly.  
Angrily turned around and furiously punch Jeremy's hand he met a pair of wet, apologizing and totally drunk eyes.  
'Do not touch me' he hissed that low and warningly.  
'James, listen, I'm sorry' eyes scanned his own socks.  
'Clarkson, what the fuck do you expect me to do today? Forgive that shit? It's not for the fist time, but now It is fucking enough.  
'James, I...'  
'Jeremy, you swore and promised so many times that you will never cheated on me and here we go again, your stupidness and selfishness brought our relationship to the fucking end.' He almost screamed that to Jeremy, he can't even believe that he said this horrible words to a man he loves so bloody much, but God knows how many times James forgive him. It is a punishment for James. Jeremy do love him, he knows that, but he was a one hundred percent dick who can't control even his own cock when he is glass to many wine and sees beautiful woman.James feels that his face was red with anger and sorrow.  
'Go fuck yourself with anybody else, I am out'  
And with that Jeremy lift his features with trails of huge tears, which was dropping on the wooden floor.  
'James ,love ,please...' he was begging, reaching for James with his trembling fingers,so much pain in his eyes. He seems so vulnerable and miserable that James was worrying that he going to broke right there.

But James quickly replayed all previous and totally meaningless apologizes in his heavy head and something in him switched.  
He was losing his temper and mind badly, his anger reached the point where he doesn't care even on iota about Jeremy fucking Clarkson. He was about to kill him, hurt him as fucking much as he did.  
He lift his hands and punched him hard in the chest, than grabbed him by his shirt and smashed against nearest wall.  
'I don't fucking love you, you fucking nothing for me. I gonna use you as well as you used my trust.' he hissed that straight to Jeremy, watched straight to his eyes, trying to reach every single fiber of his being and hurt him terribly. He felt no sorrow in this moment, felt no sympathy for Jeremy even when he was about to break.  
James don't give a toss when he grabbed Jeremy's wet from tears throat, chocked him hard with his one hand, other was still trying to dig into Jeremy's hammering heart.  
'I fucking hate you' the poisoning words hanged heavily in the air.

  
Madness dictated what to do, madness was the only one who has enough power to save them from death or leaned them towards her.

  
With enormous power James pressed himself to Jeremy and smashed their mouths together with so much force that the kiss was with metallic taste of blood from their broken lips. That was not even a kiss, it could be described as a mouthfucking.  
His hands severed thick fabric of shirt, which was once given him by James on his 56 birthday.  
Jeremy didn't respond, but did not resist anyway. James do not care.  
He forcefully turned Jeremy round to face the wall, smashing him hard and lowered his scratching hands on Jeremy's body, watching with unlimited anger the tiny scratches from someone else's long nails on the back of his lover, tearing his disfigured skin apart with short nails, trying to show who really owns this huge body.  
When the whole skin on Jeremy's back was red with scratches and little blood drops James angrily began unbuttoning Jeremy's belt and jeans, dropping his pants along with his underwear.  
He started to spreading his arsecheeks apart and digging his dry finger in Jeremy's arsehole.  
With that Jeremy produced a painful sigh but did not try to escape the scorching penetration, he rest himself on the cold wall and painfully whined.  
James do not care about Jeremy's comfort or feelings, he unzipped his cock, spat in his palm and smeared himself. That is going to hurt, such rough penetration gonna end up pretty bad, James know that, but he wanted to hurt Jeremy so badly that this is even better if he will hurt himself as well.  
He dig in Jeremy's tight with one hand, another steered his cock inside Jeremy with unbelievable force. Jeremy hissed at this, but didn't move.That truly hurts both of them and James spat on Jeremy's hole to ease his tension. That sort of helped, the cock was balls deep in Jeremy, tight and unprepared.  
James returned his hand to Jeremy's throat, squeezing hard and pulling him back, spat on his anus again, more this time, started to moving roughly inside and slowly outside of Jeremy's trembling body.  
All spinning around James, whole world did not exist in this moment, only that achingly beloved body ahead in which he should thrust harder and harder.  
James thrust deep in Jeremy and after a few minutes Jeremy came, never touched his cock,James came seconds after, deep inside him, spilling hot semen and burning him, groaning loudly in little space of corridor, never loosed his dominating grip on Jeremy's tired and exhausted body.  
James removed his hands from Jeremy, hid his cock in pants and zipped himself.  
Jeremy with obvious pain in movement silently slid to the floor, looking somewhere blind eyed.  
Eyes were no longer filled with tears, there was no pain in them anymore, there was absolutely nothing.  
James stood over him, watching him. All anger began to evaporate from him and turned to a slight sorrow not because he hurt Jeremy but because he meant to hurt him much deeper.  
'You can stay here, if you want to, you can be with me, if you want to, but you have no rights to own my heart, Jeremy. Everything but not my heart.' James said that quietly, sliding near Jeremy, offering him a cigarettes from the pocket of his jeans. Himself he also took one, lit the fag and lit Jeremy's.

 

They sat like that for a very long time, smoking a whole pack in a deathly silence.  
'No feelings than?' Jeremy's voice was weak and broken in the deafening silence.  
'No feelings, no responsibilities.' James slowly exhaled poisoning cigarette smoke above them.  
'I do not belong to you, you do not belong to me.'  
That was another long moment of silence between them, both finished their last cigarettes.  
'I love you, James.'  
Of course James know that, how could he not? That was obvious but unfortunately, not enough. James loved him too, every fiber of his being loves Jeremy so hard that it hurts. This man is his lover, his world, his life. He hates himself for this enormous love for the man and he is aware that betrayal is not the greatest thing divided between two lovers, but this is their reality.  
Does he have the right to change Jeremy? And does it make sense?  
Because no matter what,  
'I love you too, Jeremy.'


End file.
